


New Beginnings

by just_a_witchy_girl



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-War, Asexual Neville Longbottom, Draco Malfoy in the Muggle World, F/F, M/M, POV Draco Malfoy, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Previous Auror Harry Potter, Professor Draco Malfoy, Professor Harry Potter, Professor Neville Longbottom
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-09-05 06:20:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16805152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_a_witchy_girl/pseuds/just_a_witchy_girl
Summary: With Voldemort vanquished, his father in Azkaban, his mother on the fringes of sanity, and everyone in the wizarding world against him Draco Malfoy flees to the muggle world for refuge from the hateful stares and glares.Draco has been in hiding for 7 years until one day an owl shows up on the window sill of his apartment with a request for him to come back to the wizarding world for an important job. And who else should he run into then Harry bloody Potter.---AN: This is mainly a fic about Draco and will be in Draco's pov, but there will be a slow building drarry.





	1. After the Battle

Mother, Father, and I fled before the battle was even over. When Voldemort came up to the front doors of Hogwarts from the Forbidden Forest, Harry Potter laying lifeless in the great oaf Hagrid's arms, and announced that a change of sides could be made I walked over to where my parents stood beckoning, very much aware of the countless pairs of eyes watching me on both sides.

As Potter made it known that he was still alive and the battle resumed, we snuck away and apparated back home to Malfoy Manor. But we couldn't stay here anymore. As former headquarters for Voldemort and his followers, it wasn't safe here and it was likely to be confiscated by the Ministry of Magic to aid in tracking down former death eaters. Not to mention there were too many bad memories here. Too much dark magic. So we packed up the essentials and apparated to the outskirts of London. We found an inn to stay at while we thought up our next move.

We watched that night as the Dark Marks on my father and I's forearms slowly faded. They were still visible, but just barely. We knew what this meant. Potter had succeeded. Voldemort was dead. For good this time. He wouldn't be coming back.

I laid in one bed with mother while father laid in the other. She held onto me, gently stroking my hair. My head was tucked under her chin and I could feel her silent tears fall on the top of my head. We fell asleep like that.

<~~~>

The next morning the sound of the door being busted down startled me awake. I shot up and looked towards the door. Five Aurors were standing there with wands all pointing at my fathers' bed. The only one who had a wand was my mother, but it was on the other side of the room. They had found us, and we were defenseless and vulnerable.

"Lucius Malfoy," the Auror in front bellowed in a deep, authoritative voice, "you are sentenced to life in Azkaban for assisting You-Know-Who. Narcissa and Draco Malfoy," he glanced at mother and I before continuing, "trials will be held to determine your fate as a result of your aiding in You-Know-Who's efforts." With that as their premise, they cuffed my father and took him away, presumably to rot away in Azkaban. After they were gone, my mother broke down into sobs. Still dazed, I turned to mother and held her while she sobbed with tears of my own streaming down my face, the rule of 'Malfoy's don't cry' momentarily thrown to the wind.

"Draco," she croaked. "What are we going to do? We're condemned for sure."

"I don't know, mother. I don't know." I couldn't think straight. Fear, sorrow, and guilt coursed through me. Mother whimpered and I stroked her back comfortingly. We sat like that for what seemed like hours.

<~~~>

Mother and I's trial was about a month later. We pulled ourselves together and fixed ourselves up as best we could and made our way to the Ministry of Magic. Mother gave me a sad smile as she straightened my dress robes. "You look lovely dear." Her smile faltered a bit, "if only we were dressing for a different occasion." The sorrow was so strong in her eyes that I had to look away or else I might've started crying again. I didn't want to go to Azkaban. I know I probably deserve to go, but I was scared. In Azkaban, I'd relive the events of Voldemort's reign for the rest of my miserable life. If I was lucky they'd sentence me to a dementor's kiss and I'd be done with it all. I vaguely wondered if that was what is to happen to my father.

We showed up to the Ministry of Magic a couple of hours before our trial was set to start, anxious to get it over with and know our verdict. The wait was agonizingly nerve-wracking. We were sitting on a small bench in the hall. Mother was holding my head to her chest as she stroked my hair when the sound of someone clearing their throat next to us caught our attention. I looked up to see if it was someone coming to collect us for the trial but low and behold, none other than Harry sodding Potter stood before us. He had this stupid sheepish look on his face.

I felt mother shift and let go of me. I shot her a panicked look as she stood to which she responded with a smile before saying, "I think I'm going to go get some water." Then she was gone leaving me alone with the boy wonder.

He took her previously occupied spot and I sat up even straighter. I didn't know what he wanted but it couldn't be anything good.

A long time passed in silence before I decided that I couldn't take it anymore. Just as I opened my mouth to say something Potter spoke up. "Thank you. For what you did at the Manor. I appreciate it." I'm sure I looked like an idiot with my mouth hanging open so I snapped it shut.

I opened and closed my mouth a few times trying to make words come out but all I managed to do was look like a fish struggling to breathe. My mind couldn't formulate a coherent response. Why would Potter be thanking me? I made his life miserable for 6 years. One act couldn't possibly make up for that. Could it?

"Erm, thank you for, er, saving me. From the fiendfyre." I replied awkwardly.

He nodded. "Sorry about Crabbe."

Crabbe. I stiffened. I still didn't like to think about it. It brought too much guilt. All the memories did.

As the members of the Wizengamot started to file in one by one I knew it was finally time. Mother returned to my side and Potter bid us both farewell. Mother gripped my shoulder and I placed my hand over hers. Then we walked in to face our sins.

The charges against us weren't as bad as that of the other death eaters but they weren't good either, and we were sure we were doomed. But with Harry "Golden Boy" Potter's testimonies about mother saving his life in the forest, the countless times I was too afraid or hesitant to fulfill Voldemort's wishes, and the time I also saved his life in the Manor, we were freed of most of our charges. We were both sentenced to five years of house arrest and constant check-ins with the Ministry. Mother settled down in a nice little house on the outskirts of London while I got my own apartment not too far from her. But we wouldn't live happily ever after; I don't think either of us knew how to be happy again.


	2. Seven Years Later

I wake up with the sun peeking through the blinds and a massive hangover. "Fuck," I groan. Fireball is a sure way to get me fucked up and it tastes remarkably like the Fire Whiskey I used to steal from father's liquor cabinet back in my sixth year at Hogwarts.

Slowly, I swing my legs over the edge of my bed and sit up. I sit there for a moment and wait for the room to stop spinning. When everything finally stills, I shuffle out the door and to the kitchen. Grabbing a glass from the cupboard I fill it with water and grab some muggle painkillers. Popping two Ibuprofen in my mouth I down the water in the glass then fill it again. I sit down on the barstool and sip slowly at my second glass of water until it's gone, then put the glass in the dishwasher and start coffee and breakfast.

I set a saucer of milk on the ground as the bacon and eggs are cooking and soon the soft pitter-patter of paws is heard coming towards the kitchen. Through the doorway struts a cat. A little white thing named Rose mother had gotten for me as a housewarming gift.

With my Slytherin mug (I just couldn't give up my house pride) full of coffee and a plate of fried eggs and bacon in hand, I settle onto the couch and turn on the muggle news. The stories are boring and trivial, and I mainly just watch to see if there is any disturbance in the wizarding world akin to what happened when Harry perfect Potter started school. I've distanced myself from the wizarding world, completely integrating myself in with the Muggles. I haven't visited my father in Azkaban in the seven years he's been there. I haven't visited mother, who's now become a recluse. The only connection I have to that part of me is my wand which mysteriously showed up in a package at my doorstep a few weeks after my trial with no note on who returned it, though I have a slight suspicion as to who it was but I have no earthly idea how he got my address.

Suddenly the door opens and I jump up into a defensive stance. I left said wand in the drawer of my bedside table, but living with muggles for going on seven years has taught me how to throw a pretty damn good punch. The intruder put their hands up and I sigh in relief when I see who it is.

"Dammit, Zane! I thought we talked about knocking!" I growl in frustration as I briefly flashback to when the Aurors burst into the inn room seven years ago. They have no reason to take me away, but that doesn't mean I'm not still always on edge. Plenty of people probably want me dead as well, both wizard and muggle.

He walks over and wraps his arms around me. "I'm sorry, babe. I didn't mean to scare you. You are the one that left the door unlocked though." I huff but relax into his embrace.

"I hate you," I grumble. He kisses the side of my head and I can feel the smile on his lips. "Can I finish my breakfast now?" He lets me go and sits on the couch next to me.

Zane is, of course, a muggle. After leaving my mother to fulfill my house arrest on my own, I discovered that I was gay. Actually, I guess I always knew I was but I never accepted it until after the war. My parents don't know though. I haven't spoken to either of them in years and I don't want this to be the reason they finally hear from me. My father would be livid and my mother is too unstable to predict what her reaction would be. Zane doesn't know about my parents. He asks few questions and knows my past isn't something I want to talk about, for which I'm grateful.

I met Zane a couple of years after moving to muggle London:

_I was already pretty buzzed on two glasses of vodka and a shot of heroin, and it was still a couple of hours away from the curfew the Ministry set for me._

_"You look pretty lonely over here." A deep voice joked beside me. I looked over and into bright aquamarine eyes. The face accompanying the eyes was gorgeous as well. Dirty blonde hair, full lips, and a face that could have been sculpted by an artist._

_"What makes you think I'm alone?" I asked with a slight slur. He just grinned and chuckled. It was a deep sound and I couldn't tell if that was the cause of my racing heart or the mixture of drugs and alcohol. I downed the rest of my third drink and slung my arms around his neck almost falling off my chair in the process._

_"Why don't we take this back to my place?" I whispered in his ear with a slight giggle at the end._

_"Yea, why not?"_

_After turning down the wrong street twice, we had finally made it back to my apartment. We were standing at my door and I was trying to put the key in the slot but it wouldn't quit moving. "Dammit, th-ole won stop movin'," I growled._

_The man beside me let out another low chuckle before he took the keys from my hand and opened the door. I grinned and stumbled through the now open door. The man caught me before I fell face first on the floor. "M'hero," I slurred out and placed a sloppy kiss on his cheek._

_"Where's your bedroom." I took his hand eagerly and lead him to my room. I pushed him onto the bed and climbed on top of him. "I don't even know your name," he said as I was unbuttoning his shirt._

_"Draco," I mumbled out, more concentrated on the buttons that wouldn't stay still. He laughed at me and grabbed my hands, holding them in his._

_"I'm Zane, although you probably won't remember in the morning." He gently moved me off of him, got up, and headed towards the door. I frowned as he turned back to me. "Stay here," he commanded._

_He came back a couple of minutes later with a glass of water. He handed it to me with a smile. "Drink this then I think you should lay down."_

_I downed the glass of water then laid back on the bed as he covered me up. Zane made his way towards the door but I stopped him by grabbing his arm. "Lay down with me," I whined. He smiled and laid down on top of the covers. I curled into him and soon my eyes were closed and I fell asleep._

~~~~

_When I woke up the next morning I was still in my clothes from the night before and there was a delicious smell coming from the kitchen. Dazed and still half asleep, I drug myself out of bed and to the kitchen. There was a gorgeous man standing in my kitchen, in an apron, cooking. "I'm dreaming," I mumbled._

_He turned from the stove to look at me and smiled brightly at me. "Good morning Draco. Did you sleep well?"_

_"Very," I answered hesitantly. "And you are?"_

_He chuckled. "I figured you wouldn't remember. I'm Zane Connell. We met last night." Ah, now it all made sense. But why was I still in my clothes?_

_"Did we..." I trailed off._

_"No. You were pretty wasted so I brought you home, got you some water, and put you to sleep."_

_"That's not usually how my nights go."_

_"You do this often then?" He asked with a tone of accusation, turning back around to the stove._

_I grimaced. "Fairly frequently," I admitted._

_He nodded then turned around with a plate of food. "Maybe you should consider a change of pace." He set the plate down in front of me. "I made french toast. I hope you're hungry."_

_I loaded my plate with a couple of pieces and a generous amount of syrup. I brought the first bite up to my lips and groaned as I chewed it. "God, this is amazing. Marry me?"_

_He just grinned and let out one of those sexy chuckles. We've been dating ever since._


	3. A Quiet Date Out on the Town

"So what's on the agenda for today love?"

"Well first, I need a shower to wash away the rest of my hangover," I answer as I get up to take my now empty plate and mug to the dishwasher.

"Fireball again Drake?" Zane asks gingerly and I just shrug in response. He hates that I get drunk almost every night, but he understands why and at least I've quit the drugs and random sex. The sex stopped when we started dating, but convincing me to stop doing drugs took a few months. Alcohol is the only thing that keeps the memories and nightmares at bay. I've tried Muggle dream catchers, Nyquil, Dreamless Sleep Potions, anything and everything in my desperation to make it all stop and go away. But nothing worked as good as getting blackout drunk. Except, maybe, sleeping in Zane's arms. He seemed to be the only healthy way to fight if my demons, but he wasn't always here. While he did spend a good portion of his time here, he had his own place, his own life, his own agenda. I couldn't expect him to be at my every beck and call. I wasn't that selfish.

In the bathroom, I turn on the water to let it heat up then strip. I glance in the mirror at my reflection, something I don't often do and try my hardest to avoid. There are long scars across my chest from Potter's spell in the bathroom our sixth year. On my right ribcage is a glowing tattoo of the constellation associated with my name that I got done by a wizard tattoo artist I met at a bar, there are flowers surrounding my wretched Dark Mark, and a Hungarian Horntail adorns my right shoulder. The flowers and dragon are muggle tattoos; the constellation is the only magical tattoo I have.

As I look upwards I am greeted by a paler than usual face and lifeless grey eyes with deep bags underneath them. I turn away from my reflection and get in the shower letting the steaming water hit my back. I stand there for a few minutes letting the hot water work on my tense muscles before starting to scrub my hair and, when that's done, the rest of my body.

I walk into my room after my shower and see a ball of white fur all curled up on my pillow. I sigh and my lips turn up into an amused smile. "Rose," I whisper sitting next to the small cat and beginning to pet her head. "I thought I told you that if you're going to sleep on the pillows to at least sleep on the one that I don't use." She just stretches in response and curls back up, making no effort to get up and move. I, on the other hand, get up and walk over to my closet to get dressed for the day. I pull on a pair of dark blue jeans and a light gray sweater and finish by slipping on a pair of black Vans. All I do for my hair is run my fingers through it to get out some of the tangles.

I walk back out to the living room where Zane is sitting on the couch watching some show with paper people and laughing. "Drake," he says noticing that I came back into the room. He pauses, whatever he originally intended to ask me now completely gone from his mind. "You look great," he smiles, adoration written all over his face. I smile and blush slightly in response. "Have you ever seen this show?" He asks me finally lifting his eyes from roaming my body to settle on my eyes.

"No," I reply as I sit down next to him.

"It's South Park and it's hilarious. You've gotta watch the rest of this episode babe." I have to agree that this show is pretty comical. It's very vulgar but by the end, I'm laughing right along with Zane.

"So what's on the agenda for today?" Zane asks again turning down the tv when another episode of South Park starts to come on.

I curl up into his side more. "I'm fine with what we're doing right now."

Zane chuckles, "of course you're okay with doing this. You're such a homebody Drake."

I shrug lazily, "what's wrong with that?"

"Come on," Zane whines. "It's Saturday. Let's go out and do something fun." Zane never was one for just staying in and taking it easy. He always wants to go out and do something.

And he knows I'm a sucker for his insufferable whining. I smile at him and give in, "I hear bowling is fun and I've never been."

His face brightens and my smile widens. "Then let's go!" He exclaims as he jumps up off of the couch. "What're you still doing sitting there?" I laugh as I get up to follow him.

————

"So how do you play this game again?"

"You go up to the line and roll the ball towards the pins trying to knock down as many as you can. Here, watch me." Zane goes first and I watch him intently my Slytherin ambition determined to kick his ass. He knocks down all but two of the pins but gets another try and knocks them both down as well. When the pins are repositioned he knocks six more down.

He turns to me and smiles, "now it's your turn." I pick up a ball and look at it doubtfully. It's surprisingly heavy. Zane chuckles beside me. "Would you like me to help you?" I nod at him.

We walk up to the line together and Zane shows me how to position myself. Then he takes the wrist of my hand that's holding the ball and guides it. When I release the ball we watch in anticipation as the ball rolls down the runway and...

"You got a strike!" Zane exclaims as the ball knocks down all of the pins.

"Is that good?" I ask uncertainly, recalling that in an American muggle sport that Zane watches, strikes aren't a good thing.

"Yes, babe, that's amazing!" A smile breaks out across both of our faces and we laugh together. My next two turns after that I knock down a total of eight pins.

————

"How did you beat me at your first time of bowling?" Zane grumbles with a pout as we walk out of the bowling alley.

I chuckle at him, "don't be upset, babe. I'll buy you ice cream." Zane instantly perks up at my promise. He picks me up by my waist and spins me around. Laughing and now slightly dizzy, I pull his face down to mine (damn him for being so tall) and kiss him deeply. Zane kisses me back just as intensely and I smile against his lips.

"I love you," he says seriously as he gazes into my eyes. I can see his love for me reflected in his eyes.

"I love you too." I take his hand in mine and lead us to the ice cream parlor down the street. We walk in a comfortable silence. I truly do enjoy Zane's company. He's nice to me and sweet and I can tell he genuinely cares for me. I love Zane, but I don't think I'm in love with him the way he is with me. I don't know if I know how to really love.

When we arrive at the ice cream shop, I walk up to the counter and order a scoop of cookie dough ice cream for me and a scoop of rocky road for Zane while he sits at our usual table. When I finish paying I walk over to where Zane is sitting. Our table is settled in the corner of the store farthest from the door and has a single booth facing a rather large window. I slide in next to Zane and he instantly puts his arm around my shoulders. We sit there chatting and watching the people go by outside until our ice cream comes, then we eat in a comfortable silence.

Looking out the window I thought I saw a familiar looking tabby cat sitting on the sidewalk staring in the window at us. It seems odd but I just shrug it off. It's probably just a stray looking for a handout. When we finish our ice cream Zane throws his bowl away but I take the little bit of melted ice cream in my bowl out to the cat, then we make our way back to my apartment.

The rest of our day is spent, to my delight, with the both of us curled up on the couch watching Rom Coms. Since both of us are now in a lazy mood and neither of us feels like cooking we order Chinese takeout for dinner.

As the day winds down to an end, my eyes start to droop as I'm laying on the couch with Zane. He scoops me up and takes me to my bed. Deciding to stay over tonight, Zane crawls into bed with me and we fall asleep cuddled into each other's arms.


	4. The Unexpected Invitation

I woke the next morning to a tapping noise. Rolling over, I check my phone before realizing that my phone doesn't make that sound and with Zane here no one would be texting me anyway. "Rose quit messing with whatever you're messing with," I groan the command to the cat. The tapping went on. Sighing, I get out of bed and go to see what that damn cat is doing.

When I enter the living room I find Rose and I'm surprised to see her looking up at an owl sitting outside the window tapping on it. "Babe! Make it stop!" Zane shouts as he walks out of the bedroom.

"I'm right here you don't have to yell," I mutter with a grimace. It's too early in the morning for his shit.

"What's an owl doing tapping on your window? Aren't they nocturnal or something?" He asks with a yawn while rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

I look towards the owl and freeze in fear; there's only one reason an owl would be tapping on my window in broad daylight. What do they want with me now? It's been seven years, my house arrest was over two years ago, and I've been doing my monthly check-ins with the Ministry. Zane knows nothing about wizards and I've barely used any magic since going into hiding. I'm not breaking any rules. I've done nothing wrong.

Slowly, I walk towards the living room window and open it to let the owl in. He flys over to the kitchen table and drops a letter on it. I feel a cold sweat run over my body and I pet the owl hesitantly as I stare at the letter with worry. Zane walks over to investigate the situation. "Hogwarts? What's Hogwarts?"

"A school. My school. I went there when I was younger." I answer still in shock and trying to process why I could possibly have a letter from Hogwarts in front of me. Was this about redoing my seventh year? It seems a little late to be requesting my attendance. Maybe this is all just a dream. A very bad dream.

"I've never heard of it."

I compose myself before responding. "It's private and it's not in London."

He shrugs and goes to make coffee since there's no chance of us going back to sleep now. I hesitantly open the envelope and take out the letter, an odd sense of deja vu taking over me.

"So what does that school want with you now? Haven't you graduated already?"

"Not technically," I mutter as I skim over the letter then read the first sentence over and over again.

_Dear Mr. Malfoy,_  
We request your presence at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to take over the place of Potions Professor.  
Term begins on 1 September. We await your confirmation owl no later than 31 July.  
And thank you dearly for your thoughtfulness with the melted ice cream.  
Sincerely,  
 **Minerva McGonagall  
Headmistress**

"So what, they want you to come back or something?" I didn't even know Zane had come back over until I heard him right beside me. I jump startled as he takes a closer look at the letter. "School of Witchcraft and Wizardry? What's this, some sort of joke? April fools day is long over." Zane's words come from behind me but I'm not paying much attention to him. Potions Professor? Me? They've got to be bloody mad to ask me to come teach at Hogwarts. The students will be more scared of me than they were of Severus and the other teachers and staff would hate me. I gulp. "Drake? This is a joke, right?" Shit. Minerva, why'd you do this to me? I was doing fine until your stupid bloody letter showed up.

I sigh, "no, it's not a joke and I think we need to have a talk about some things."

————

"So you're a wizard? You went to a school for magic and now they want you to come and teach?" I nod. Zane is taking all of this surprisingly well. Better than most muggles do at least. "But why now?"

"I don't know why she thinks it'd be a good idea for me to come back as a professor. Granted I was beyond exceptional at potions in my younger years but I haven't brewed a potion in ages and I'm not exactly welcome in the wizarding world." I ramble on stopping myself as a look of concern settles on Zane's face.

"Why aren't you welcome? It's where you grew up, isn't it? It's where you belong?" Zane asks curiously.

I bite my lip. "There was a war during my last year at Hogwarts between a very dark wizard and his followers and the rest of the wizarding world, including a lot of my teachers and classmates."

"Well, what's that got to do with you? You didn't fight did you?"

I nod again. "My dad fought on the dark side as did my mother and I by default."

"Default? How can you fight by default? And especially on the side of evil! You act as if you had no choice!" There's anger in Zane's voice as he shouts at me. It catches me by surprise.

"Zane, I-I didn't. If I didn't obey him- if I didn't do what the Dark Lord asked-" I cut myself off as I feel tears start to sting my eyes.

"Drake?" Zane asks his voice calm and hesitant now.

"If I didn't do what he said he- he'd hurt my parents, Zane. Kill them even. Then he'd kill me with no mercy. But no one knows that. No one would care anyway. They just see me as this evil person that wanted to be a part of it all. But I didn't. I wanted nothing to do with Voldemort and the Death Eaters. I did what I had to do to stay alive. I did what I had to do," the tears are streaming down my face now as my previous years at Hogwarts and the events of the war come flooding back to me. All the death I've witnessed, the hate-filled glares from the rest of the wizarding community, the fire in the Room of Requirement. All of it comes flooding back as Zane pulls me into a hug and I sob into his shoulder. Malfoy's don't cry, but dammit I can't seem to make the tears stop. I've held it in for years and the dam has finally overflown.

"Oh Drake," Zane whispers, his voice full of empathy. He holds me as I cry and rocks me until I can't cry anymore. "Are you going to go?" Zane asks, a hint of worry evident in his voice.

"I don't know Zane. I really don't know. I have until July 31 to think about it."

"That's in two weeks, babe."

"Don't remind me," I groan. Go back to Hogwarts and teach? And be back where everyone still probably despises and wants to kill me? I have to be insane to even be considering this. I should just say no and be done with all of this. But somewhere deep down inside of me I know that Minerva won't back down so easily.

We go on about the rest of our morning in silence. Zane leaves shortly after to go to work promising to come back tonight and take me out. I'm left all alone with my thoughts. _I'm gonna need a drink_ , I think to myself. I call in sick to work for the first time in nearly 7 years and pour myself a glass of Fireball.


	5. Decisions and Encounters

There are thirty minutes until Zane gets off work and I'm already slightly buzzed on Fireball.

I jump in the shower to wash off the day's stress and get dressed in a black button-up shirt and grey skinny jeans. As I'm slipping on a pair of Vans my phone dings on the bedside table.

_Zane: About there babe_

**Me: I'll be ready**

_Zane: Better be ;)_

I grin as I run a hand through my hair and walk out into the kitchen to check Rose's food and water before I leave for the night. I drop an ice cube into her water bowl to keep it nice and cold and because I know she likes playing with it.

When Zane arrives I admire his outfit. He's dressed in a blue plaid flannel button up, black vest, and acid wash jeans. "You look hot," I tell him with a smirk.

He smirks back as his eyes roam up and down my body. "I could say the same to you."

Zane opens the door for me and I climb into his car. He's living proof that chivalry is not dead. He climbs in and we set off for the restaurant. I'm praying I don't run into anyone from school. Even if I haven't seen anyone in nearly seven years, and we're in Muggle London no less, Minerva's letter still has me set on edge.

————

Zane takes me to my favorite steakhouse in an effort to calm my nerves and take my mind off of things. It became my favorite place to eat shortly after moving here and it's where we had our first official date.

"Thank you, Zane. I really appreciate this." I say halfway through dinner.

"Anything for you babe. I love you," he says with a smile.

"I love you too." A warm smile finds its way to my face.

We make idle chit-chat throughout dinner asking about each others' days and reminiscing old memories.

"Rose hated you when you first started coming around."

"She didn't hate me." Zane protests with a scowl.

"She practically mauled you every time you went near her! She still nips at you every so often."

"It's called tough love. We have a very complex relationship."

I burst out laughing and Zane grins. "You're delusional."

————

After finishing dinner and polishing off a bottle of wine we set off to roam the streets. The city always looks much more amazing at night, and Zane knows exactly how to calm my nerves.

We walk with our arms linked, laughing and joking. We're stopped on a bridge looking out at the river holding hands. My head is laying on Zane's shoulder and out of my peripheral, I see a figure approaching us. I look up and when I see who it is I freeze and unconsciously squeeze Zane's hand. "Drake?" He asks looking down at me before tracing my gaze to the person now stopped directly in front of us with a look caught between malice and shock.

"Malfoy," they finally sneer.

"Weasley," I whisper with a gulp.

"What are you doing in the Muggle part of London?" The redhead questions, glancing over at Zane who has a look of confusion on his face.

"I live here now. Why are you here?" I ask noticing his Auror robes. "Has something happened?"

"No. I've just gotten off work and I'm going to help George with the shop."

"Oh," I say and Weasley takes that as his cue to leave. He walks around us and as he walks away I call out to him. "Say hi to George for me and tell him I'm sorry about," I hesitate. "Tell him I'm sorry about Fred." He turns around to look at me in surprise before continuing on his way.

"And that was?" Zane asks, breaking the long silence we've been standing in.

"Ron Weasley. We went to school together."

"Why wasn't he very friendly towards you?"

"It's complicated," I reply with a sigh. "Let's just say we didn't really get along very well."

"Who's Fred?"

"One of his brothers. George's twin. Fred, um. Well he," I squeeze my eyes shut as flashbacks of the war flash through my head. "Fred died in the war," I finally finish, though my voice is barely above a whisper now and it cracks at the end.

"Oh," is all Zane says but he places his hand on my lower back and rubs soothing circles that help me to calm down.

We continue with our walk but seeing as I'm not in a very good mood anymore Zane decides to call it a night and takes me home.

————

It's been a few days since our date and the run-in with Weasley, and Zane and I are currently sprawled out on the couch watching a movie. A Rom-Com I believe is what Zane called it.

"Zane, I think we need to talk." He looks over at me curiously as I sit up slightly. He pauses the movie and sits up as well.

"What's up?"

I take a deep breath before speaking, "I'm going to take the teaching position at Hogwarts."

He grimaces. "Why? Why go there where people hate you? Stay here with me. You've got your job at the bookstore. You love the bookstore. Why would you want to leave?"

"I owe it to Minerva, to the wizarding world, to amend my mistakes. Teaching at Hogwarts is a start."

"You don't owe anyone shit. They judged you based on a name before they got to know you."

I sigh. "That doesn't matter. Not to me."

"It matters to me."

"Zane," I beg. I don't want this to turn into a fight. "Please." I'm not even sure what I'm saying please for. Please don't be upset? Please don't take my side? Please show me anything but love and compassion because I don't deserve it?

He frowns, "I have to go."

"Zane," I say grabbing his arm. He yanks it out of my grasp and walks out the door.

_So much for this not turning into a fight,_ I think as tears start to stream down my face. I wipe them away (Malfoy's don't cry and all) but more keep coming to replace them. Finally, I give up and curl into a ball on the couch violently sobbing.


	6. Goodbyes and Second Chances

Zane was becoming increasingly distant ever since I told him I was taking the position of Potions Professor at Hogwarts, and the day was fast approaching for me to leave.

"How long will you be gone teaching?" He asks one morning as we're sitting at the table drinking coffee and eating breakfast.

"The school year ends in late June." He frowns before going back to eating his cereal in silence.

I sigh as I stand to put my now empty cup in the sink. I get ready for work and as I'm about to leave I hesitate, but he doesn't say a single word. Not even a muttered goodbye. I turn the knob with fresh tears stinging my eyes and head to the bookstore.

————

Early in the morning on September 1, I crawl out of bed quietly. I face my boyfriend of almost five years with tears running down my face at what I'm about to do.

"I'm sorry Zane. You were never supposed to know about any of this, not yet. Not until we were happily married adopting a magical kid of our own. It wasn't supposed to happen like this." I whisper to his sleeping form. "I love you, Zane Connell." I kiss the top of his head before uttering the spell sadly, "Obliviate." I watch the picture on his lock screen change from one of the two of us to one of just him before grabbing my trunk and Rose's pet carrier and walking away from my old life.

————

I stand on the platform staring at the Hogwarts Express and suddenly it's like I'm 11 all over again. The same tingling and fear and blinding excitement fill me again, and I'm almost happy to be returning to Hogwarts. Then I remember I'm not 11 anymore and dread replaces the excitement. Any other means of transport would've been grand, but I've no access to the floo network and thanks to my sentence my apparition license has been revoked.

"I've lost my bloody mind," I mumble as I make my way to one of the entrances.

I board the Hogwarts Express and go immediately to the very last compartment. However, upon opening the door I notice that it's already occupied.

"Malfoy." The person breathes in surprise.

"Potter," I mumble. "Sorry, I can find somewhere else to sit."

He smiles at me warmly, his previous look of shock vanishing. "Don't be ridiculous. There's more than enough room for the two of us." I sit down hesitantly across from The Boy Who Lived. I must say, the past seven years have done well for him. He's buffed up some since school. His usually messy mop of black hair has grown out and is pulled back in an equally messy bun. His emerald green eyes are still hidden behind a pair of round spectacles, but they don't look as dorky as I remember. His lightning shaped scar is as distinct as ever. I look away before it's obvious that I'm staring. "So you've accepted Professor McGonagall's invitation."

I scoff, "of course you know about that."

Potter laughs. "She tells me everything." I turn away from the conversation and look intently out the window. Potter clears his throat. "Ron says he ran into you the other day. Says you were surprisingly civil." He starts, trying for conversation again.

"Couldn't say the same about him," I reply my eyes never leaving the window.

"Ron will come around. He's just a bit stubborn." I could hear the amusement in his voice.

I chance a glance over at Potter to see him already looking at me. I quickly avert my eyes before speaking up. "So what are you going to Hogwarts for? I thought you became an Auror like Weaselbee."

"After doing that for a while I decided it wasn't for me. Brought back too many memories. That and with the responsibility of raising Teddy I couldn't be so careless with my life anymore. So I quit and Minnie-er-Minerva offered me the position of DADA professor."

I glance back over at him. "I heard about Andromeda's passing. I didn't attend the funeral. Figured no one would like to see me there anyway. I did visit her grave the next day though." He gives me a sympathetic look. I decide to change the subject. "So you've been teaching for a while, then."

He nods. "It suits me better. I never was cut out for fighting." I scoff. _Understatement of the year._

Potter gives me a look of amusement. "What about you?"

"Pardon?"

"What have you been up to after," he pauses nervously, "everything?"

"After my father was sent to Azkaban and mother and I's house arrests?" He nods, a guilty expression now adorning his face. I shrug, "not much of anything. I integrated myself into the Muggle world, got a job at a bookstore, met Zane-"

"Zane?"

"A Muggle. My-" the words get caught in my throat so I take a deep breathe and continue. "My ex-boyfriend."

"Oh," Potter says lamely. There's an awkward silence before he speaks again. "I'm sorry."

I wave my hand dismissively. "I'd rather not talk about it, Potter. If you don't mind."

"Right."

I decide to turn the topic of conversation back to him. "So what about the Weaslette?"

He looks at me skeptically. "What about Ginny?"

"Will there be a wedding? Or is that the first thing you did after the war?"

He grins sheepishly. "Actually, we aren't together anymore. I thought of her more as a sister and she felt the same. The family was shaken at first but Ron said he liked it better this way. I just don't think he liked me dating his sister." Harry let out a very sexy chuckle. _Shut up!_ "She's dating Luna now."

"Lovegood? There will never be a more powerful couple."

Potter grins. "I could think of a better one." I gulp at the look on his face.

"Weasley and Granger? What are they up to nowadays anyway?"

"Hermione works for the Ministry, working her way towards Minister. Ron's an Auror, but you knew that already. George runs the joke shop by himself mostly, but Ron helps out when he can." I nod slowly. Everyone has really done well for their selves after the war. And here I am drowning myself in whiskey to keep all the memories at bay.

"Married life is treating them well I assume?"

"Yea, you could say that. Ron and Blaise seem really happy as do Hermione and Pansy," Potter says looking mildly in thought.

I sputter, a gasp that turns into a violent cough. "They- who- and what- then how?!"

Potter smirks, "Blimey, Malfoy. You really haven't kept up with anyone since the war, have you. Not even your friends?"

I turn my attention back out the window. "I distanced myself from everything after the war. And 'friends' is a loose term. I doubt they want anything to do with me anymore. After Crabbe-" I cut myself off as I feel tears start to sting my eyes. I quickly blink them away repeating _Malfoy's don't cry, Malfoy's don't cry, Malfoy's don't cry._

"They never shut up about you. Mainly Pansy. She's always fretting over you, wondering if you're doing okay, worrying if you eating right and if you're healthy. It's bloody annoying sometimes." I turn to Potter in shock and see a small smirk on his face.

I clear my throat, uncomfortable with this touchy-feely topic. I want the attention off of me. "You mentioned you're Teddy's caretaker now. How is he?"

"He's-" Potter is cut off by the sudden and rough opening of the compartment door. A mess of blue hair flies in and settles itself in front of Potter.

"Harry I need money! The trolley lady is almost here and I'm hungry!"

Potter chuckles. "You know you shouldn't fill up on sweets. Molly packed sandwiches for you to eat." I can hear the small child huff and I can only imagine the pout plastered on his face as Potter grins. "Alright fine. I'll give you some money but don't go overboard. And get me some chocolate frogs and pumpkin juice." Potter suddenly turns his attention to me. "You want anything Malfoy? My treat."

"No, thank you," I respond with practiced Malfoy politeness.

Potter nods and the child glances at me briefly before shooting out the door. Potter chuckles as I stare after the fading streak of blue. "That was Teddy."

"That?" I ask with a look of utter shock. Potter nods with a grin. "He's so big." I murmur.

"He's 7."

"7," I whisper. Teddy is my cousin, technically my first cousin once removed, but we're still family. And he's already 7 and this is the first I've seen him. And he has no idea who I am, I'm sure.

"Malfoy?" There's an edge of worry to Potter's voice.

"He's no idea who I am. What I am to him. I've really screwed up." I said still staring at the open compartment door.

"Andromeda used to talk about you to him." My head whips in Potter's direction in shock. "She's told him all about you, and Narcissa, even Lucius. She's told him that even though you guys made some mistakes you're still his family, and that family is the most important thing." I can feel the previous tears start to slowly roll down my cheeks and I wipe them away quickly because Malfoy's don't cry and certainly not in front of the savior of the wizarding world. "Get to know him Malfoy. You deserve to have a relationship with him." I nod weakly and attempt to pull myself together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finals are here, then Christmas, so chapters may be kinda late for a while.


	7. Hogwarts Will Always Welcome You Home

Teddy comes bounding back into the compartment with both arms full of various sweets and a huge grin on his little face.

I chance a glance at Potter and see that he is smiling at Teddy with a fond look in his eyes. I quickly look away and back out the window before Potter catches me staring at him. Not that I was staring at Potter.

A few minutes pass before I feel a small tug on my coat. I look over and see a small hand offering me a chocolate frog. I look up to see Teddy staring at me intently. He looks determined.

I hesitantly take the sweet from him expecting him to go back to sit next to Potter again. But to my astonishment, he stays. He looks like he's contemplating something. I begin to wonder what he could possibly be thinking about when he speaks up. "Can I sit there?" Teddy asks pointing to the spot next to me.

"I-uh-yea. Sure," I stutter out and scoot over to make more room for the child.

I sit there staring at him in bewilderment while he stares blankly back at me. "You're cousin Draco, right?"

I open my mouth to respond but all that comes out is a croak, so I nod my head instead. I don't know what to say to him. I've been absent from his life for 7 years. I can only imagine the stories he's heard about the Malfoys, and I can only hope that whatever good picture Andromeda has painted us all in has penetrated through all the negativity.

"Do you need help opening your chocolate frog?" He asks skeptically.

"Oh, uh, no. I can open it, thanks." He watches me expectantly so I open the treat. The frog makes its escape hop, but I grab it before it goes anywhere.

"Who'd ya get?" He asks excitedly, bouncing in the seat slightly.

I look at the card and groan. Of course.

"Oh, just Harry,” Teddy says with a hint of disappointment. “I got about a bazillion of him."

I glance up at Potter. When I see the smug grin on his face I contemplate throwing the frog at him. Instead, I break it in half and give the larger half to Teddy. "To thank you for sharing your sweets with me," I explain when he gives me a questioning look. I hold onto the card and secretly tuck it into my coat pocket when Potter and Teddy aren't looking.

The rest of the train ride is filled with me answering Teddy's questions about my family and him laughing at Potter's horrendous jokes.

\-- -- -- --

When the train pulls into the station I'm not surprised to see Hagrid is still escorting the first years. 

I make my way with Potter and Teddy to the thestral drawn carriages and we all file into one.

Hogwarts is just as I remember it. It's so beautifully repaired, its as if the battle never happened. Like the war was just a dream, a nightmare. But it was real. All of it was real.

I feel a panic attack creeping on. Oh no, not right now. My breathing becomes rapid.

"Malfoy?" There's a hint of worry in Potter's tone. I shake my head rapidly. I feel a small hand grasp mine I look down into worried eyes.

"Cousin Draco?" Right. I need to get my shit together. I try to take a deep breath.

5 things I can see. The stars. The thestrals. Teddy. Potter. The castle.

Another deep breath.

4 things I can feel. The cold seat of the carriage. The fleece lining in my coat. Teddy's small hand. The slight breeze blowing through my hair.

Another deep breath.

3 things I can hear. The soft breathing of the thestrals. The excited chatter coming from the other carriages. The birds in the trees.

Another deep breath.

2 things I can smell. The unmistakable smell of the Great Lake. Potter's cologne.

Another deep breath.

1 thing I can taste. The lingering sweetness from the chocolate frog I had on the train.

Another deep breath. And another. I can feel myself calming down now.

"Malfoy, are you okay?" Potter asks. I nod my head and smile down at Teddy. He grins back at me and squeezes my hand.

"What was that Malfoy?" Potter asks. I sigh and look up at him.

"I'd rather not talk about it right now." He nods but the look on his face lets me know he's not going to let it go. I sigh again. We're nearly at the castle now.

\-- -- -- --

When we enter the Great Hall it's as grand as I remember.

I trail behind Potter and Teddy, who're holding hands, as we all head to the teachers' table. I see Headmistress McGonagall and nod curtly at her. She smiles warmly back at me. As we approach the table I see Hagrid, who must be teaching Care of Magical Creatures again, and an array of both old and new faces. Flitwick, Hooch, Binns, Trelawney, and. . . "Is that Longbottom?" I ask shocked.

"Hm? Oh, yea. He took over Herbology sometime after the war. He's a fantastic professor."

I'm glad to see Longbottom has done good for himself, especially since I treated him so horribly in school. I'm sure he hasn't forgiven me so I'll have to keep my distance from him to avoid awkward confrontations and, _Merlin's beard, we're heading straight for him!_

We reach Longbottom and at first, he's ecstatic to see Potter and Teddy, but then he sees me and his face goes pale.

"Hey Neville," Potter greets. I shuffle nervously behind him. 

His attention shifts back to Potter. "Harry, Teddy, it's so good to see you."

"How was your summer?"

"It was great. I spent nearly all of it gathering new plants for the greenhouse!"

"That's great Neville."

Throughout their whole conversation, despite the grins and light banter, Longbottom keeps throwing fearful glances towards me. I do my best to avoid his gaze, but I can only glance around the Great Hall so many times. It's not like it's changed since we went to school here.

I'm caught off guard when I'm finally spoken to.

"Malfoy," Longbottom whispers. I whip my head around to look at him and I see him jump. "What-what are you doing here?" He stutters out.

"I-"

Potter cuts me off, "Minerva asked him to come and teach Potions," he explains looking at me.

 _What am I, a child?_ I glare at Potter. "I am more than capable of speaking for myself, _thank you_."

Potter chuckles then looks back at Neville. "He's changed, Nev." He pretends to think about something. "Well, for the most part." Neville laughs nervously with Potter.

"I'm sorry for how I treated you in school Longbottom. I really am." Neville stares at me with his mouth hanging open for a minute, then quickly recomposes himself.

"I never thought I'd live to see the day when Draco Malfoy apologized!" Neville jokes, rather loudly I might add.

Potter grins, "I told you, Nev!"

I roll my eyes and huff then plop down in the nearest seat.

The sorting ceremony starts shortly after we get settled, and we all watch with different expressions.

Teddy looks elated, Longbottom looks proud, Potter looks almost remorseful, and me?

I'm watching with a look of pained nostalgia.

\-- -- -- --

The Great Hall is almost cleared out now.

"I'm going to retire to my room," I announce standing up.

Potter and Longbottom look over at me with traces of butterbeer on their upper lips. Potter glances over at Teddy, who has long since fallen asleep in his pudding. He chuckles. "I s'pose I should head that way too."

Potter downs the rest of his butterbeer, picks up Teddy, spells his face clean, bids farewell to Longbottom, grabs my arm, and pulls me out of the Great Hall towards the DADA classroom.

"Potter, I can walk on my own you know?"

"Yes, Malfoy, but then you'd be on your merry way and I wouldn't get a chance to talk to you about the carriage ride."

I grimace. "What's to talk about?"

"Um, how about what the fuck happened?"

" _That_ , is none of your business," I sneer.

He stops abruptly and turns to me. "Malfoy-"

"Potter," I cut him off. _Payback for earlier,_ I think to myself.

" _Malfoy._ It may not have be any of my business in the past. But we're friendly now." I raise my eyebrow. He sighs, "Friendlier. And I know that whatever that was wasn't good. I get it, we've both been through the same things, and it's hard-"

"We have _not_ been through the same things. And you don't _get_ it," I hiss. I'm seething. It's just like Saint Potter to think that he knows how to heal everyone!

I yank my arm from his grasp and stalk off towards the dungeons.

"Malfoy!" He calls after me.

"Shut up before you wake Teddy," I whisper-shout back at him. I don't turn around though.

I make it to my quarters in the dungeons. "Home sweet home," I mumble to myself. My trunk is already here, no surprise there, and Rose is curled up on the foot of my bed sleeping soundly. I quickly change into my pajamas and crawl into bed.

Classes start tomorrow and I am not at all prepared. "What the bloody hell was I thinking? I wish I could go back to Zane and forget this whole thing ever happened."

I cry myself to sleep my first night back at Hogwarts. It really is like I'm back here as a student.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Baha it's been a couple of months. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about this story. I've been really busy with shit. Sorry


End file.
